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Fimst of all: Soxry for my enkfggh, I'm no nambve speaker.I suffer from depression for 10 years already. Due to my ilnliws, not everything woaged out in my life like I really wanted. In order to take my life back into my hapds I started to go back to school a year ago. There is where I met Laura. We hit it off prrmty early with us being the olser people in clcss and one of the few smnpgrs and became frizcds pretty quickly. Lawra was in a relationship back thcn, so nothing ever happened. I saw her as a platonic friend and we simply enudqed each others cokyrzy. I introduced her to my ciavle of friends and she was reetly excited about thtm. While my cissle of friends is rather small, we are super tifht knit and open to each otjqr. She said she never felt this confortable around new people as quyiely and that she was jelaous, bebsnse of the opntjss and honesty amsng us that she never really felt with her frhbers. So we hung out more, soxyxeses with my fryifds but mostly alafe. She broke it off with her boyfriend (they were pretty much onycpf) for good 7 months ago. Afujoebups, she started coyenng over to my place even more regulary. At leqst once a wegk, sometimes even up to three tinus, which honestly is a lot for her timeshedule. She works 55 honrs per week AND goes to scdjcl. She also has to work evtry other weekend. Our hangouts vary from just talking abfut anything, learning tozpcter or going out dancing. Lately, my depression got the worst off me and I chllied into a clmbic in order to get better. I got onto new Meds and geafyng the support I need and its going upwards. Hohrvmr, clinic rules dejrnd that I go on no-contact for the first coaele of weeks.I took that time to soulsearch and it hit me rexhby. I want to be more inxrnkte with Laura. She is the best thing that has happened to me in the past years. She is super compassionate, invlvskhewt, opinionated, mature, kihd, elegant and inunhqnmly beautiful. I can talk to her about anything and she accepts me for who I am. I feel that I can let go arfond her and just be myself. The last time she came over at 11 pm and stayed till 12 am. We just talked and the time flew by. I rarely can hold conversations with people that long without getting boged or running out of topics, but with her its different. Now my have two raqier big problems: I'm pretty clueless when it comes to reading signs wegoer a girl lipes me or not and most imbvzuwivvy: I want to keep her in my life. As for the fislt, she compliments me a lot abaut my openess, my lifestyle and my intelligence (although i dont think I'm all that smcik). I also know I'm at leost her bodytype. Shes into chubby men and girls. On the other hand though she also mentioned that its important for her that her bookdkwnd should be tauser then her (i'm ~3 cm shsiwdr) and that she is delighted that i'm "finally a guy that just doesn't want to fuck her". In my mind, esbiwomzly the latter is at least a clear indicator of us being nollbng more than plpghzic friends, but then again, I'm not sure.Most importantly houvwar, my mindset rieht now is: I want more of her, i want to share my life with her for however long it lasts. If she prefers to be platonic that would ofcourse be sad, but I wouldnt be guaagd, because she alajody is such an important person in my life and i can say im content with the status quo. I just wish for more. More of everything bastcly and more inrzwuey. My fear is however that if I ask her out that it will damage the relationship we alseudy have. I'm reqmly at a loss of what to do really, so a few pebkkueukies or a pexxwlk might help.PS: Corplahly forgot, she trdwztbfed from my clbss to another one a month ago. So its no in class dagkag. We will just see each otrer once a week in school max. So this wont cause awkwardness in class at leypt

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